Today’s Moment of “Tell ‘Em Like it is” II

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Assalamu Alaikum,

Another set of quotes I have recorded from class and random encounters. They may be slightly misquoted.
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(Note: pH=-log[H+], pOH=-log[OH-], pKa=-logKa, etc.)

Professor: If you need the function of your kitty cat at home, you do negative log cat (-logcat) to get pCat, which sounds like an exam to get into pharmacy school.” (PCAT)
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Professor: You are expected to know this. You know what an expectation means. It means you will see it down the road in a ‘written exercise’.
(About tests)
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Professor: (repeatedly) If an equation is named after someone, then it is important.
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(Someone’s phone goes off)
Professor: KILL IT!
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Faith786: I know what you were doing the night before the chemistry exam.
Professor: Really? What was I doing?
Faith786: You were out on the city roof tops, fighting crime and evil with your super mad chemistry powers.
Professor: (smiles) Maybe subconsciously.
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Faith786: Adam, ask (Professor) why Sulfuric acid is a strong acid but it has two hydrogens.
(Professor overheard)
Professor: I don’t know.
Faith786: But you have to know. You know everything about chemistry. You invented chemistry!
Professor: I am a 100 years old, not 400!
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Professor: (on the board) So here water is an acid and here water is a base. What does this tell you about water?
(Pause)
It is schizophrenic, no?
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More later….

Lies My Chemistry Teacher Told Me: Inert Gas and K

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Assalamu Alaikum,

I always wanted to write that book as a joke, but my chemistry professors are mad geniuses and they know that they are teaching me lies. =)

(Well, I am in General Chemistry so I suppose whatever I am learning is super simplified. So maybe I should say incomplete concepts.)

Today’s Lie: Adding an inert gas (i.e. neon gas) to a container with a reaction in equilibrium will in no way affect which way the reaction will shift.

Are you seriously telling me that if I added 80 mols of Ne gas in a small closed container, nothing will happen?

Faith786’s pseudo supposition: If you add a CRAZY amount of inert gas, the reaction will shift to the side with less mols of gas or the side that takes up less space to accomodate the gas invasion.